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HELPING A SHY CHILD
Those of us with shy children may feel the pain of our child's loneliness and discomfort in social situations at school
or on the playground. If you were shy yourself, you know how hard it is to be in a crowded room and feel like you wanted to
sink into a hole. Shy children may not be confident enough to assert their personalities and may be embarrassed to talk in
front of people because they are not used to it. It is difficult to bring a shy child out of his shell, but it is possible
and it is best to try and do it before your child is off to school where he could get lost in the shuffle.
One of the best ways to bring a shy child out of his shell is to associate him with a child who is very outgoing and outspoken.
Often, just being around this other child will change both children's behaviors, each taking cues from the other and letting
their personalities wear off in the process. The outspoken child may calm down a bit and your shy one will be a bit louder!
Another way is to associate your child with another child who is even more withdrawn or shy than he is, if that is possible.
This will often give the child a sense of power and nurturing as he tries to help the other child feel more comfortable. After
all, your child knows how the other child feels and will feel empathy and want to help.
Getting your child involved in activities early on is a great way to bring your child out of his shell. Things like play
groups, gymnastics, sports for young children like soccer, are all great ways to form associations. Even if your child only
finds one or two good friends, it will help him a great deal.
Encourage your child to be a part of your conversations at home and try to make him feel like a valuable part of the family
with an important opinion. These things may help you see the more outgoing side of your child eventually and gain some friends
in the process.
by Constance Wallace
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